Live night 29

THERE'S NO MUSIC BUT I CAN'T STOP DANCING (James 32 video):

John James feels the need to dance with robot Josie. He comes up behind and squeezes her so steadfastly the cardboard crumples up considerably. John has Josie in the guillotine choke hold around the top of her silver head and presses all his weight into the embrace. I love that Josie is just sitting there and letting this happen.. because it's JOHN! 

JOHN: (putting on the Govan and Josie phrase) Mooom! Moooom! (shaking her fiercely) (SC) 

He takes her by each wrist and sashays away, cheerily jiggling back and forth as they recite the saying 'there's no music but I can't stop dancing!' Eventually John puts her down and leaves her be; Steve tries to figure out which film this is from but Josie believes Govan made it up.  It was like he was trying to make her entrapment (in the suit of wretchedness) more fun for her because that was the kind of bloke he could be. 

"He just can't leave her alone! Were the other house mates blind?" (lambbah) 

"I totally agree. How can they have been so oblivious?" (giwwy)

9.41pm, Josie and Steve are still at table, Josie reckons Steve looks the handsomest she's ever seen him today (with his hair). She jokes about taking off her glasses and Steve flips her off. In the viper's nest, Dave telling Ben that Caoimhe will bring the whole house down with negativity.

BEN: I know, honeypie.

DAVE: Caoimhe's always with Josie and John.. she was never with them before Shabby.

The tiresome twits are mercifully interrupted by John to ask if Ben is doing the washing up.

YOU'RE NOT MY FRIEND NO MORE (James 32 video):

Ben's New Zealander hairdresser, who loves the programme is one of the few people he gave full disclosure to about the possibility of being on the show. John aww's Josie as she approaches the nest. 

JOSIE: Alright, love. Benjy? 

BEN: (she doesn't need him to be nice to her) Baby? 

She notifies him that Steve thought he was doing the washing up and he gets a little murdery as he barks back 'I said I'd give him a hand, it's not my bl**dy night! I'll give him a hand!' Sound familiar? He's such a Pinocchio! John and Josie bicker around because John wants her to let him roll a fag for her but she had been looking for that lighter/filter paper. Ben asks her to say to Steve that he and Dave will be in there later to do it. 

JOHN: (like a very polite toddler throwing a tantrum) Let me roll one, let me roll one! Can you let me roll one? Can I roll one up please?

JOSIE: (her friends are chumps in the ciggy-rolling department) Nooooo because you're wasting my bacci! (John is adamant that he's not) You're both sh*t! 

Dave plans to put their skills to the test but Josie confirms that Dave won so he lays back down, now feeling alright so long as he's the winner. He jests that it's becoming quite a regular thing now 'beating Johnny James at stuff!' Josie calls out lampooning Rolf Harris 'do you know what it is yet? Do you know what it is yet? It's John James' penis!' 

JOHN: (pouting and sulking and sighing) Nah! (shuts the Nest door on her) You're not my friend no more. 

He then clears up that Dave had just talked about loving beating him - his friends are the same way. Dave predicates that John James is the most competitive housemate and probably the most competitive person he's ever met too 'but there's a few flaws in your competitiveness called lack of ability!' John haHA's loudly that Dave gets a lot of pleasure off the back of beating someone who thinks he's better than he is. 

Dave reads his competitive nature that John would practise rolling and rolling until he had it down to a fine art; John concurs that Dave knows him well. Everything he does, he will do until he's the best in the group 'not the best in the world.. as long as I'm the best in the group! I'm like that - that's why my friends love to beat me at everything!' 

His loys get a lot of satisfaction out of beating him at sh*t. Dave decides it would be cool to have a pool table in there as they'd stay up until 5 or 6am playing; John is sh*t at it but would stay up until he was the best. He confirms that Dave is right because if he felt he was going to be in the house long enough, he'd roll every one until they were spot on and then he'd ask 'you wanna a roll?' 

JOHN: You've read me well cos that's exactly what I do.

DAVE: (sounds worse on reading but he was being bantery) Same old Crabeyes! I looked at your picture, saw the crab eyes and I saw everything about you. I did the Benny experiment! 

Interesting that John doesn't say a word to Dave about calling him the C-word but lets it go and teases Benny about what he's going to do about that mop top as the weeks go on. Ben is going to have to style it himself but it's hard as is his hair is quite thick. 

I'm sure John was a viciously, unbearable asshead sometimes if he didn't get his own way especially if it concerned Josie. I read a Dr Phil article that said people of an 'overly competitive nature oftentimes cause tension in their personal relationships' and that 'the need to win is a search for external validation.' I just hope that John never treated their love as a competition or a power struggle.. we saw in BB how in an argument even with Josie, he would generally want the last word. 

It's not a bad thing to try hard and want to excel in everything you can.. but it is if it starts to come between that person and their partner. Maybe John's enemy in the relationship wasn't Josie but his inner - James.. 

9.51pm, Dave carries on laughing. John talking to Ben about his hair! He uses 'texturised gum-stuff' Ben says he has kinky hair. John asks where he got the idea to style it like he does. Dave says 'Shirley Bassey!'

I LIKE HAVING THAT RELATIONSHIP WITH HER (James 32 video):

Ben is attempting to confide in John and Dave that he was divided about whether or not to appear on BB. Josie bursts open the door to whisper (YELL) sweet nothings (SOUR SOMETHINGS) out to John, with more Rolf Harris 'do you know what it is yet?' impressions. She thought it was too cute so she had to say it again! John questions if she has to take the mickey like that :D and dead on cue Dave lets one rip. 

Josie blames John James immediately and he harks up 'as if it was me, I don't fart like that!' She closes the door, sealing in the stink of the burp from Dave's bum! Ben is enjoying chatting with John and likes it and again wants to finish what he'd been saying before their rude interruption. 

Less than 10 seconds later, she's baaaaaack requesting for John to come here a minute as she needs to whisper something to him. He's wary, believing that she's going to burp in his ear or something. 

JOSIE: (has a qualm!) I don't do things like that! 

Ben approves for John to go as long as he comes back, so John starts to get up and Josie slams the door shut with a dirty laugh! Dave declares that she's horrible. 

BEN: (this isn't the compliment it sounds) She loves you, it's nice! The only person who loves me, the way Josie loves you - is Dave!! 

Dave doesn't know about loving Ben that much; Ben does because he doesn't perceive Josie as wanting to have sex with him but just loving John. I really think that's not very nice of him and I am so uninterested in what his insights are. He couldn't even say one kind word without turning it back around to himself! Quiffhead was so oblivious to the feelings bubbling up inside of John and Josie and that there was definitely going to be some sex-having between them after the series! ;)  

JOHN: (sweetly) I like having that relationship with her. 

Dave opposes this and states that given half the chance and get a couple of cans of lager in her she would 'what did she say? 'Half a lager and lime and I'm anyone's!' John giggles that she's a randy mare. Ben eventually gets to return to his original point about his divided views on doing Big Brother. 

"Ben always got so jealous of the relationships other HM's had, especially John and Josie." (LyndeeDavo) 

10.05pm, Nathan and Corin bitching about John again. Nathan whinges that John and Caoimhe don't talk to them and mainly talk to Josie, claims they are isolated. They sort out where everyone is so that they can keep tabs on group dynamics. Steve and Nathan whinge about the fact that housemates don't do their chores. Then they whinge about the fact that their whinging makes them look miserable b*stards.

10.18pm, Ben now talking to Caoimhe about John....apparently John is either thick or cruel, but Ben can argue him under the table. .......even though he now says he's just had a good discussion with him. Ben says that John always says negative things to him. Pot. kettle, black.

BEN: John is like a little boy. Doesn't engage with anyone else but Josie who is like his mum.

Josie walks in. Ben lies that they were talking about doctor. Josie has been given something to help her give up sucking her thumb. Big Bro-bot reminds her that she should be in her mashed up robo-suit. Caoimhe says he idolises her - on about John and Josie?

Josie has now left, so back to moaning about John. Ben has forgotten the point he is making... Caoimhe says that John is struggling, Ben sounds surprised, asks if John is struggling like he is. Caoimhe says he is struggling with the same things she is, arselicking etc. Ben asks why John speaks to him the way he does. Caoimhe says that people may be jealous of Ben because they see him as a threat, because of the reaction on Friday, thinks people love him.

CAOIMHE: John finds comfort in Josie. He is struggling in here.

John shares her opinions on people and falseness p*sses them off.

CAOIMHE: John said that when Steve was thinking of leaving people's eyes lit up.

Ben didn't notice; Caoimhe calls John a genuinely good person - Ben can see that.

10.28pm, JOSIE (to Nathan): Sucking my thumb to me is like smoking is to you.

Corin grassed Josie up to Big Brother for not wearing her costume.Lovely girl...

UNLESS YOU WANT TO BE ROBOT SWIMMING IN THE OCEAN (James 32 video): 

Josie and John James fool around by the pool. 

JOSIE: (seems plenty nice) Right John, I'm going to have a fag then I'm gonna give up the thumb...the other thumb! 

He imitates her and then whistles shrilly; Josie runs round to his side as though to push him into the spa. It gets a laugh out of John but he puts on the breaks, with a warning -  'unless you want to be robot swimming in the ocean.. I suggest you play veeeeeeeery carefully!' She's a rogue, she's a rapscallion and she will be avenged.

TRIES TO COUGH AT YOU AND THROW BOOGIES AT YOU! (James 32 video): 

Dave heeheehee's that Josie is trying to do everything she can to look cool and comfortable in her costume and it just ain't working! 'Such a sad day for you today, having to wear your old robo-outfit everywhere. Look at you!' I think the phrase I'm looking for here is "RACK OFF, YOU BIG CAHOOT!" 

JOSIE: (the world can bite her ass) It is when your F**KING chin's on fire because of the glue on the robot suit!! Bad times Dave, bad times. 

Dave howls hysterically asking why and 'which chin is it? Show me!' it wasn't utterly cruel but that's really what a self-conscious person wants to hear, isn't it (?!) This shows that he has an ugly sense of humour to even use a source of Josie's insecurity to muster a cheap laugh out of John. I was slightly insulted on Josie's behalf that John would chortle at this but in his defence it did sound like one of shocked disbelief! 

JOSIE: (goofily) I'll tell you what's really, really, really, really funny Dave - YOUR FACE!

JOHN: (off camera coming to buffer) You don't mess with Josie Gibson!! 

Dave describes her as amazing and they all look at the state of her, catcalling and 'Ayyyyyyy-ing Jose! The jeers become too much and she pounces at Dave like a platinum panther and they grapple maleficently. She orders him to lick his teeth now, having smeared some of her stop-thumb-sucking-stuff on his face.  

Curiosity gets the better of him and he has a taste but is left unimpressed and demanding to know what it is. (SC) John follows after her to the bathroom throwing something at her; Josie hollers at him for being a twat! She tries to sound all (hard and ghetto with her lingo but it is just laughable) 'Don't f**k with me cos I will f**king f**k you up!' 

Josiebot goes on the rampage, chasing him off by spraying something at John which he thinks might be bleach - it's only window cleaner but John giggles that she's 'right out of order!' The robot makes her hyper-exaggerated kung fu noises before instructing John to move and 'go play with the traffic!' 

JOHN: (frolics with her) You're the next best thing to play with. Have a look at ya!

Josie calls out for Ife, exclaiming 'p*ss off John James!' as she tries something on. He's amused that she 'picks her nose! Tries to cough at ya and throw boogies at ya!' She wanders off to see how Ife has been lighting her fags while the lads continue to chuckle at her. Dave checks out how they've given Josie the crappiest costume which looks terrible as BB went to no effort with it. 

John notes that BB had gone to the most trouble for sure with Corin's puppet, even going to find the exact hat that she wears. Because Dave is still sniggering at her 'just because I'm a Bristolian!' Josie finds something to lob in his direction but it lands closer to John. He chucks it back which lands right in her box and he flips her off!

DAVE: (has to start spreading bad word of mouth) She's as mad as a box of frogs, that one. I'm telling you. Glory! 

"Josie starts play fighting with Dave then John James wants in on some action! XD LMAO!" (RedLadyBug91)

11pm, Josie says she's going to bed as she can't cope with her costume and can only take if off if she goes to bed. Dave kindly tells John that tomorrow might be his last whole day in the house

John is snipping a few loose bits off Dave's hair. 

DAVE: Did he do a good job?

JOHN: In the time he had he did a good job...well not a good job. The back is the worst but I think Ife did that.

John tells Dave that he and Mario decided they weren't up for a haircut from Ife. Ife always had her wigs on during the auditions

11.16pm, John is saying it's funny how Ben always drags someone in for support, adding something like - 'Steve will support me on this...'

Steve pipes up - 'I would if he stopped bloody calling me Ironside!'

11.21pm, Josie telling someone in the BR that with every single person in her family who died she has had a dream about them with the earth exploding behind them.

I HATE THE TYPEWRITER JOHN (James 32 video): 

At the start, Caoimhe and Ife are getting their smoke on at the carousel. JJJ are in Josie's double bed toying with each other flippantly. Le jeux commences with Josie's impersonation of John's little widger 'do you know what it is yet?' 

JOHN: (the results of his investigation .. or PERVING has led to this conclusion) Since we're playing this game..I'll comment on the region that hasn't been shaved for some time!! (She self-labels it 'the bush!') The bulge that you seem to have happening down there! 

Corin empathises with Josie because it is embarrassing having to shave in the shower. Josie claims hers as gone like you wouldn't believe and her hair has grown. 

JOHN: Yeah, you can see it through her pants, yeah!

Coz smiles on as she observes the bed badminton banter taking place; Josie trifles for John to shut his mop. He light-heartedly fires back for her to not take the mickey out of him. She sees no problem as he had already told the entire nation that he had a little widger anyway. John's gut is busting so much so that he slips back and thwacks his head against the wooden headboard! 

Josie cackles coquettishly until he owww's and buries his bumped brain into Josie's bust 'did you hear that?' She tousles with his injury so he laughs for her not to make it worse; Josie whispers wantonly for him to come there a minute. She manages to entice him over and thrusts the thumb into his gaping gob - it's what she's been clamouring for! 

A repulsed John EWWWWWWWWW's after catching a taste of the anti-thumb sucking treatment! 'What WAS that?!!!' He needs no excuse to mount her after some devilish fun tussling and tangling. John forces her to suck her own thumb as payback but she threatens his little balls! 

John, his loins on fire, manages to straddle Josie so she becomes the submissive; he accidentally knees her in a boob before turning to a tried and tested method of punishment - the typewriter. His life just got more awesome as he is afforded free access to dadadading at her teats!! ;) It's getting hot and heavy as his crotch is directly under her kisser - INTIMATE! 

JOHN: (Christian Grey charges her) Put that thumb in your mouth! Or I'm not stopping! Put that thumb in your mouth!

JOSIE: (whimpers) I hate the typewriter, John! 

JOHN: (can't keep his passionate paws off her for 2 seconds) Ayyyyyy! Put the thumb in or I'll give you a wet willy! (bet Josie has given YOU the wet willy here!!!) Put the thumb.. (they both keep stopping to laugh) put the thu..

JOSIE: (her debt is paid) JOOOOHN! Owww (pushes him off and they scuffle) Get off me.. (She's a kicker!) 

JOHN: Don't be kicking! Bl**dy horselegs! 

JOSIE: (That could be lethal!) Get off me cos I will.. do you know what? I'm gonna put your f**king b*llocks on a platter! 

JOHN: You letting go? Alright. Why have you still got hold of my shoe? Why does your hair look like a lion's mane? 

Josie realises that she is having a bad hair day today and John adds that she looks like the lion from The Wizard of Oz. 

JOHN: (it was abhorrent to him) Oh God that was eugrrrrghhh! That was SO disgusting! 

She chuckles and requests that he gets her toothpaste as he hops off the bed. There's no hard feeling as he decides this will definitely stop her from sucking her thumb 'that is, that is really sick - isn't it? Eggrr. That is really bad!' Just as he is about to leave the room, Josie urges John to tell her the truth with regards to if she's having a really bad hair day. 

JOHN: Everyone can see you're having a really bad hair day! (walks out)

Sometimes in the house they were really DIRTY cute; John didn't even disguise that he wanted to give Josie's sex organs a proper jostling!! ;) (Could I be any cruder? You betcha!) As Josie was quite a commanding character, it seemed like John needed to assert his dominance as a man with her, so that she wasn't always overpowering him. 

I apprehend that Josie made him feel more alive than he probably had in YEARS and maybe around this time, John was starting to apperceive this could be the start of something really amazing. Even though it all went down the pan, at least they had the courage to feel. 

"Lol the adjustment, and people think he did not like her or being physical with her, LOL.. any opportunity and it was John who was the one who had to have physical contact with her. Aww want him home from Oz now, so that they can have some Triple J time."(Lorraine McKee) 

"This must be a really stupid comment but I think John likes giving Josie the typewriter coz he gets to sit on her XD haha!" (RedLadyBug91) 

11.37pm, Caoimhe has moved to John and Josie's bed and is telling John again about Dave and the fact that she still wants to challenge his 'beliefs.' John is telling her what he said when he joined the conversation but I can't hear what he's saying. John is talking to Caoimhe about Shabby and their friendship; he suggests Shabby would've said something if she felt it was getting too uncomfortable between her and Caoimhe.

JOHN: Everyone's got positives and everyone's got negatives - that's the way of the world.

11.51pm, John, Caoimhe and Josie are talking about clothes that BB said couldn't be taken into the House because of the look of them on TV.

12.06am, Dave is complaining that Josie is being negative about challenging his beliefs. Nathan is giving him some advice on how best to handle it in future. 

DAVE: (about Caoimhe) You know what Ben? You can hang around with her if you want but your experience will be negative because of it. She's carrying the same thing as Shabby did.

BEN: I agree with that.

DAVE: Ife's got away from them and she's transformed.

IS THAT A BANANA IN YOUR HAND OR ARE YOU JUST HAPPY TO SEE ME? (James 32 video): 

Nathan is letting Dave know that he hopes he's not going as he's got a lot more to give. Josie's voice is picked up through her microphone even though she's not in the bedroom but in the living room. 

JOSIE: (are her hormones going berserk after getting frisky with John?) Is that a banana in your hand or are you just happy to see me? 

We are now shown Josie as she does the finger to the eyes gesture, indicating that she's watching it closely. She makes as though to sit on its lap 'ooooooh what you doing, touching my ass like that?' Josie giggles to herself before going into the kitchen. 

"Haha Josie is nuts :D" (zmcdonnell719) 

This zaniness is one of the things I like most about Jose - she was the whimsical elf that everyone looked to for fun in that house!

12.20am, Caoimhe and Mario are Irish dancing in the bathroom. Mario asks whether she did it when she was younger, but she says no, she learnt it from watching it.

YOU TOUCHED... YOU TOUCHED MY WILLY (James 32 video): 

Josie's back in bed with John after trimming her .. hedge ;) John is pestering her pervily for the finer details on how she had designed downstairs!! 

JOHN: (my cheeks redden at his inquisitions) How did you design it? What did you give yourself? Just a.. just a cheeky.. 

JOSIE: (wants to paw at him like she's a bear and he's a trash can of sweets) Fancy a bit of robot loving? 

The randy robo we've come to know and love rolls onto John and we hear no complaints as he and Josie get freaky! He dissolves into giggles as she moans orgasmically 'oh yeah!!' These two are getting carnal as John interfuses with Josie, getting into character as he cries out robotically 'warning, warning!' (Long SC due to their brazenness) Josie impudently nestles back into John only for him to cotton on that she's scheming for more thumb tomfoolery.

JOHN: (deems this objectionable) Ohhh f**k off, f**k off, you f**king randy.. I can smell that before it went in. Ohhhhhhh! Stick it in Dave's mouth. That thumb sh*t that she's got! (Dave's already had some) She's a f**king b*tch. 

Dave eagle-eyes the cushion inside Josie's costume and asks what she's doing with it; the outfit is hurting her neck so she's leaning on it. John slams into Josie with the People's elbow move once more and in self-protection her hands land around his privates. As soon as she realises what she'd been feeling up she apologises and holds her hands up in surrender. 

JOHN: (his voice rises several octaves) You touched.. you touched my willy!! (SC grabs hold of her wrist to prevent her from getting her thumb in - as he's not on board with this idea) Don't, don't, don't put that thumb in my mouth!

JOSIE: (No sirree, Bob) Just give it a suck!

He hadn't realised that Josie sucked both her thumbs, hence why she has the thumb sh*t on each of her hands. 

JOSIE: That's what happens when you're a bit of a thumb sucker, John! 

John wonders if she has tasted it yet which Josie has but is then sidetracked by the sight of Benjy moseying past with his flies and belt undone. Keevil, the wolf in sheep's clothing stands at the foot of the bed to deposition that she's so dirty and has been leaving her dirty clothes all over the place; John and Josie have too. 

JOHN: (in his American movie trailer voice) The secret, the secret! People all over the world are wondering what the secret is! 

JOSIE: (flirts incorrigibly) Do you think I look sexy? 

John's puzzled but then something horrible happens as Josie thinks a bit of snot just fell out of her nose - secreting all over the sexiness! John is on boogie patrol as he reaches over and dotingly wipes the nose poo away for her. Is it possible for him to love her more?? 

JOSIE: (a leading expert in the field of making an ass of herself) I went 'do you think I look sexy?' and a bit of snot just came out of my nose!

They get a kick out of it because then John, the big crazy had picked the other nostril! Caoimhe has come back to sit with them and wants in on the joke so they quickly give her the 411. The topic is changed to how Caoimhe went right off shouting about Nathan's fart being f**king disgusting; John had been p*ssing himself laughing. He doesn't remember if this was last night but Caoimhe was dead serious. 

JOHN: It must have been so thick you could cut it with a knife! Do you remember? 

Nathan had fired up back at her and then she'd felt bad about it but John thought Nate was going to erupt. Josie queries whether she can remove her robosuit now. 

JOHN: Yeah it's f**king 12.30 at night, Jose. Of course you can! It's f**king 1 in the morning!

Josie wants her pillow, John leaves to walk over to another bed fetching one for her but Caoimhe plans to sleep and crawls to where John had been positioned. So he diverts back to his own single bed with the pillow he originally set out to grab for his Josiebot. Caoimhe will sleep in there if Josie wants her to - Josie should have run away screaming 'HELL NO, EVIL HO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!' 

She has a skirmish taking off her robot wear which as ever doesn't go unheeded by John as he laughs 'taking that off nice and easy, Jose! Throw it on the ground!!' The piece of sh*t is wrecked, Caoimhe has to help her get rid and is accidentally kicked by Josie  so John thinks they've ripped it. 

No mark Nathan is watching as Josie re-arranges her undergarment and considers the bit of bum flesh he sees as worthy of a WOWWWWW! 

JOSIE: It's called.. it's called a total eclipse!

John snorts but his face soon shifts and can't disguise his true annoyance. Dave is muttering about having to put up with Old Fauntelroy and his 'what? What? Are you going to sleep, old chap?'-ing. 

Awww the early bloom of romance with all the .. is a wonderful thing and no other couple on BB could ever match up to them. He can deny it all he likes but John was SO into her by this point in the series and Josie in the robot suit was a true turn on for him! They really did enjoy each other and for that alone, it is immensely saddening to me.. John and Josie were 2 pieces of a very attractive puzzle and could have given each other a lifetime of happiness. 

"Am I the only one who can see it?? When Josie was saying 'I want my pillow back' he went to take her pillow but when he realised Keeva was in bed with Josie he took it for himself. He wanted to stay in Josie bed! well..I think lol" (Jola Ch)

"No I do remember him talking about it to Josie one day something about him feeling pushed out when Keeva was sharing her bed, maybe the pumpkin head convo can't remember xx" (Kat Stevens)

"Haha...he was not impressed when Nathan was whistling (or whatever u call what he did) at Josie." (cazb1986)

"I did notice as people have said, that at 03:44 John did get the pillow for Josie, but by then Keee-evil got in bed with Josie, so John went to his bed, think he wanted to get in with Josie, but as per usual Keee-evil came between them again." (mamajean) 

YOU WERE GOING TO LET ME GIVE YOU A CHEEKY FEEL (James 32 video): 

Govan had given John his remaining toothpaste when he left, so John squeezes some onto a toothbrush for Josie. She asks him to imagine some scenario about him leaving but I can't decipher it fully and it is followed up with a (SC think it is something to do with her not giving him back an article of clothing if he was to stay). 

John shakes his pancake-flat booty and a camera is right in there like swimwear!! He extracts his beanie to stroke down his hair before putting the hood back up. 

JOHN: What in the bluest hell has that got to do with me? 

Josie tries her luck, cheeking 'did you say you were leaving me that top?' This is met with a narky - NO, F**K OFF! for Josie to enjoy mimicing. She resorts to her trusty fallback of mockery the infamous Rolf Harris line 'do you know what it is yet? Do you know what it is yet?' It's her favourite way to mickeytake his penis-size with her finger as a wriggly widger! 

He can have a giggle about it now and laughs along before exacting his revenge with a small Josie jab. I guess she inaudibly remarks about her shaven .. fairy no longer being hairy, judging by Johnny's jokey response. 

JOHN: (sarcasm does not become him) Oh don't f**king lie! You can't get rid of it all with those little rusty scissors!

To prove him wrong, Josie thrusts her lady garden forward, as though holding it out for John to inspect. He sits up, and moves his masculine hand into that area about to prod at it because he disbelieves the state of its baldness. 

JOHN: (cracks up) You weren't even going to stop me then! You were going to let me give it a cheeky feel. (She protests that she wasn't and he smiles ebulliently) Yes you were! 

JOSIE: (waggish) John James I would not let you touch my tuppence like that! (arches back again allowing him to go for it, if he so desired)

We are not permitted to see if he resists or indeed cops that cheeky feel, as the cameras hurriedly divert us to my old nemesis, Nathan at the carousel. 

Hahahaaaa were they taking their first steps to having foreplay? ;) Before hooking up, it's H'OBVIOUS that John and Josie were thinking dirty thoughts about each other .. unfortunately for John it wasn't only his face that would give him away but another *ahems* part of his anatomy!! Asexual - my bottom! He was every bit as hot-blooded a man, as Josie was a woman :D

(Mixture of) HE WENT DOWN LIKE A BAG OF SH*T and LF NIGHT 29 3 videos:

HM's are in hysterics after Josie lassos Dave around with a doona cover and flings him to the floor with a victorious 'HEE-YA!!'  He forward rolls right into Steve's wheelchair after the cowgirl giddies up, which has led into a breakout of laughter in the bedroom!! Josie and John in particular find it a scream! 

JOHN: (guffaws) The wizard just went for a massive fly!! Nearly cleared up Steve's wheelchair! 

Josie howls harder when Dave explains with humour that she'd smacked him into Steve's wheelchair, his glasses had spun off when she knocked him into it! She can't breathe through her screamy hysteria as she lays on the bed and hears Dave re-enacting his interpretation of events. Dave tickles her tyrannically, John has moved back to her bed to stick his bony ass in the air! 

NATHAN: (unhelpfully calls out) She likes the typewriter! 

Dave attempts to cram the bed cover into her mouth as she yelps and clamours frantically. John advises him to use the thumbs and chuckles when Dave summarises that as she was 'strangling' him she was spinning him round!

JOHN: I saw, yeah. You went down like a rag doll! 

A great deal of sound dips and stock footage on a loop occurs, making more of a big deal of what happened. Dave threatens to fart over her (either face or pillow) she warns him not to dare. 

DAVE: (embellishing for dramatic effect) Did you see my head smack on the rim of the wheelchair? 

JOHN: You just kept going til he went down! He did an army roll right into Steve's wheelchair!

Josie's sides are killing her, she muffles her snickers with the duvet over her lips. John hadn't expected Dave to go down that easily!

JOHN: (still laughing in Dave's face) It was all in the motion.. and you were like 'if you wanna go, I'll go!'

JOSIE: I don't know what possessed me to do that. I'm so sorry. (cackles again)

Dave doesn't know either but he's come to no harm and Steve's wheelchair wasn't damaged either, so it was all good fun and Dave reacted in the same spirit! 'What the flippin' heck?' He shows her what she'd done and bends her over pulling the hood over her face, then pushes her onto her bed. 

JOSIE: (shriek) Go away!! Dave, don't mess with me d'ya know what I mean? Cos you're only gonna get it again. 

JOHN: (still grinning like one of the Chuckle Brothers) If you want another one of those, keep messing with her! If you don't.. 

JOSIE: Because I've been playfighting with John James all day, I've got a bit carried away. 

JOHN: (they giggle) Yeah, I know. That's exactly what it was! It just came out of nowhere too, she's like 'AHHHHHH!' Doing her Kung Fu Panda. He went down like a bag of sh*t! 

Caoimhe had missed it all (visiting the bathroom) and Josie says her sorries to Dave again which he accepts readily. 

12.30am, E4 LIVE STARTSSSSSSSSSSS - 

Ben is moving beds and is concerned that he's going to swap one snorer for another! Nathan counsels that if he can cope with Steve's he can also cope with Dave's. Though Steve's consistent, Nathan persuades that when Dave blasts it out there's no worse than him! Dave promises Ben that he won't snore and he won't fart. 

JOSIE: (now the wind has changed for the wind from Dave's derriere) Do you believe that Benjaminge? You'll be eating his sh*t particles in an hour! 

It'll be good for Dave to exercise some restraint over his bowels, says he. Ben is befuddled as to why they are playing musical beds at this time of night but he's definitely coming over. Steve suspects that the naughty little Benjy is just after some kip with Coz. Ignoring the quips, Ben doesn't know why he has come out of the loo and then has to make some life-changing decision. 

Corin hopes that he's washed his hands, coming into her bed - he had on Steve's towel! Dave is aggrieved that it had been Ben's suggestion to share a double bed with him in the first place, but after one night of snoring he's backing out! After all the negative crap coming out of Ben, Dave would rather share the double bed on his own. 

Ben hadn't expected to have to move all his stuff (and by that he means possessions he's stolen from other people) after exiting the toilet. 

DAVE: Just get your quilt, your pillow and your jaffa cakes and pull up there. (the jaffa cakes gets a teehee from John and Steve)  

Goes on to tell Ben, that he can stay where he was and doesn't have to share as he can befriend the new person that comes in. Ben maintains that he does want to share despite Seahorse inferring that Dave and Ben have drifted apart. Ben will tell them what it is and Corin will understand this - he hasn't slept for several nights! 

It is the first night in 25 years that Josie hasn't.. (think she says hasn't had a thumb in her mouth) and she wonders if she'll be able to sleep. Caoimhe makes a recommendation for Josie to put socks on her hands every night, so that she won't be able to suck her thumbs. I can't be sure but I think Josie intends to ask John to lend her some for that purpose but because Dave, Nathan and Ben are bellowing in the background, it may not be that. 

JOSIE: John James, if you leave.. 

JOHN: (he's wised up to Goldilocks) Are you trying to take my sh*t again?

Caoimhe effuses another time that his L'avenir hoody is so beeeeautiful - hinthinthinting! He either offers up his Flux clothing or says that they can't have that. There are no prizes for guessing where her eyes are drawn to as Josie Gibson indulges in her favourite pasttime. :P 

JOSIE: If you leave.. Have you got a hard-on, John? Joke! 

She chuckles as he pats it down and Keevil goggles at him as he does this too. Josie requests that he leaves her some socks if he does go. 

JOHN: (not knowing if he should scowl or smile at her sass) I've got no f**king socks! You've gotta remember if I have to stay here for more than a week, I've got f**king nothin'! 

So she lets up but Caoimhe continues hassling him about what shoes he has on. Good job BB has mercy on him and calls Keevil away to the Diary room; she's concerned that she said something (that she shouldn't have and is being called in for a ticking off)! Ife has Mario in a grip but they quickly call a truce, she urges Mario to go into BB and make sure everyone knows he's definitely gay! 'Say that I repulse you!' 

Droopy drawers, Mario moves in on John, rabid to romance him making out John had summoned him as Nathan is envious that Mars had said his hairy chest cuddles were nice 'and now look at you!' 

JOHN: Yeah, what are you doing? You just appeared out of nowhere! 

Nathan's come out of this smelling of roses and now has what was Shabby and Caoimhe's double bed to himself, notifying that he has room in case Mario gets lonely. Getting nowhere with the romantically unavailable John, Moley climbs into the 'big marital bed' with Nate after John knocked him back. 

MARIO: (this is major disappointment talking) No I left John to come back to you. I prefer men with hairy chests anyway. 

Baby cub cub (self-named because Mario declares he's not quite hairy enough to be a bear) catches Ben cosying into bed with Corin fueling speculation that he does indeed fancy the Mancunian 'you're a bed-hopping toff thief! Look at ya! He's like a giddy little school boy!' Corin goes along with it fake smiles, checking that it's her he wants to sleep with (SILLY QUESTION REALLY) and old HM's are wanted back - Sunshine for Dave and Rachael for Nate. Corin offered Nathan to stay in bed with her the other night because of the snoring, but he hadn't wanted to! 

Josie and John aren't on screen but can be heard squabbling off camera, while Dave throws around a makeshift rocket. John insists that Josie is exaggerating but she apparently had just seen 'it!' Corin throws her head back chuckling, that she hopes Ben's Corrie heartthrob - Stephanie Beacham is not watching.. yeah because that would REALLY blow Benny boy's chances! Ben just wants to wind them all up by being in bed with Coringe. 

CORIN: He just jumped in and attacked me! 

JOSIE: (If he was it was kinda a dud!) Ben, are you trying to smooth over Corin again?? 

Honest to God, Corin can't conceive that Ben fancies her at all and they just get on; John hahaaaaa's that he can't believe she thinks that, calling Ben a 'cheeky little a*sehole!' She's confounded to learn that most of the men really think Ben does even though Ben plays it down as teasing. 

JOHN: Look at his face, of course he does! Yeah. I know he does. It doesn't bother anyone. 

It doesn't bother Corin either but like.. she seriously doesn't think he does; Ben again admonishes that they are winding them up! John levels with Ben that he's such a liar and it is done with a Josie accented tongue-in-cheek. Then turns more serious, to relate that obviously Ben knows Corin is in a relationship but does fancy her a little bit. The lights are switched off, Corin continues to be firm that Ben doesn't or she wouldn't share a bed with someone who fancied her. 

BB draws the curtains behind Corin's bed and Steve assesses that Benny's well happy! Nathan very camply cheers Mario that he will chase him and 'you don't know what I'm gonna do to ya!' somebody wolf whistles. John can be made out telling Mario to 'come in here' which I'm going to go ahead and presume is in bed with him and Josie. His mind changes when he detects that Mars has his balls out! Unless.. I think this comment about the balls is about Ben because Nathan bets he won't get back into bed with Corin with his pants off as he'll get a stem-on! (He is only messing!) 

CORIN: (she's not exactly thrilled with the joking around) Come on guys, we're purely just mates! Drop all that sh*t! 

The Ben bantering is full steam ahead as Steve calls him out on being a slimy b*stard, for his 'harassment' of Corin. John is indeed in his favourite place with his favourite female; Josie makes much of his baby smooth feet - Sunshine had given him moisturiser to put on them but he'd only used it twice. (SC as Nathan twists the knife into Ben with an inappropriate remark about him having a rape kit!) 

John and Josie have recommenced their rough-housing as I hearken her apologising to Peanuthead. 

JOSIE: (childlike voice) John, John sowwwy I love you! I look like a scarecrow as it is. OWWWWW! My face!!

JOHN: (his enjoyment makes the thumb tastes worth it) Oh, it's alright to put your thumb in my face!? 

He's now returned to his single bed but because the Mole is up, running amok and stealing his doona he has to claim it back. Not without giving Ife's bald head a HONK as Ife had got him back for putting her blanket on the floor! Steve is getting angry now about having to defeat that robot tomorrow, so John shoves Steve's bed cover to the ground which was pointless as Steve wasn't currently in it! 

Josie's cross as she thought she and John were having a chat; he'd tried to but then she put her thumb in his mouth and got that sh*t all over him! 'You're a b*tch.. no, what's up?' She promises she won't do it again and is waiting to be told what he's going to leave her. 

JOHN: A slap!! 

Mario pays a visit to the bedroom toilet; Dave doesn't like it when the Mole's on the move as they know something is going on. (SC) The only thing that works on Ben's spots is witch hazel and tea tree oil, Big Brother gave some to Corin. Ben is still being bagged by the lads he thought were his boys - Steve, John, Nathan and Dave. 

JOHN: (getting too much pleasure out of this) Mr-I-have-to-have-at-least-9-hours-sleep-a-day!! Doesn't look like that right now, does it? 

Nathan imparts that one of the reasons Ben didn't want to move in with the Monk tonight was because he didn't want to be kept up all night talking! Dave derides that Nigel Havers, the charmer knew what he was doing when he jumped in bed with Corin. 

JOHN: (baby talks off camera) Love you, Josie.

JOSIE: No, you don't.

JOHN: (more sincerely) Yes I do. I do!

JOSIE: (like Puck from Summer Heights High) I do, Miss. I do!  

The idiots still jerk around with Benny boy for him to watch his wandering hands; Corin mouths off that her mate would never wander his hands on her as he doesn't like her like that. He's mindful that he would get whacked with a spatula; Nathan back talks that Ben would probably like that! Corin is getting hungry so invites Ben to get up for a bowl of Crunchy Nuts (SC) Nathan and Dave take her up on the offer instead. 

They retreat to the kitchen for their after-midnight feasting; Nathan huzzahs that he's a 'crunchy NUTTER!!' Corin was made to put her robot outfit on and her shoulders are killing her but she's starving. She can imagine if they go out for a fag, that the alarm will sound for the car to chase them about when they're not dressed! I must point out that the sight of Seahorse stood in only his mustard yellow boxers, is one for sore, sore eyes. 

As the door to the garden is locked, Nathan blasts out to Big Broski 'can we have a cigarette after the bowl of crunchy nuts please, love?' Mario has joined them and questions Corin on how it feels to share a bed with Sunshine's replacement - she's not bothered as Ben makes her laugh! Seeing those 3 eat a bowl of cereal makes Mario want one now but he's just brushed his teeth, he goes back to the bedroom to 'wind up John!' 

The cereal munching moves to the Living room, Dave ponders when new HM's will be brought in as they'll be down to 9 after Friday's eviction. (SC) Corin supposes that they might not but hopes that they will be full of energy. Ifs has come out too but also passes on the Crunchy Nuts due to having brushed her teeth. She sits on the nice chair that is the robot bandit which could give a nice back massage! 

Ife reassures that she knows Ben doesn't fancy Corin; they are on the same page thinking that it may be shown that she and Ben do - when they don't! She won't worry about it as she knows her feelings and that she wouldn't date Ben in a million years; she loves him to bits and he makes her laugh but he's just a mate. 

IFE: But I couldn't see him dating any females! 

Corin thinks Ben likes her as they come from different backgrounds and he buzzes off their Corrie chats. Ife leaves to go out for a smoke as BB have kindly opened the door for them - interesting that she couldn't have cereal as she'd brushed her teeth but CAN have a cigarette! (ad break) 

Caoimhe's back from the Diary room and out with her chicas at the carousel; Ife feels that she has to go inside as she's done all that running earlier so doesn't want to get caught now. The conversation is strained so the robot heads to bed, but advises Caoimhe (who is left outside alone) that a bowl of crunchy nut is fit just before; she might do that. After smoking she goes to the bathroom, Ife speaks up that she'd passed on the message about BB telling Caoimhe they should recharge their batteries (for the task tomorrow) but nobody cared. She doesn't really give a sh*t! 

When she returns to the bedroom, Steve asks what they'd said. BB had investigated if she was scared of the robot; Caoimhe knows he's nice deep down but is answered that 'tomorrow is another day!' Ife intends to kick his arse; John is liking this fighting talk from the normally timid mouse. 

JOHN: (with a Mario wrapped around him) Oooh and Ife is in the hooouse! 'We're gonna kick his arse! 

Mole leaves him in peace to re-join his woman but not before ensuring that they are still spending John's last night (which is presumed to be the next day) sharing a bed. John jokes for him to pencil him in and checks that it's still alright with Ife. 

JOHN: (of Ife) Oh she throws my quilt on the toilet floor and then has a pop at me! 

Actually what she'll do is move to John's single bed so then she can still talk to him and Mario; John is down with that. Ife plans to stick her charger batteries on so they can beat Titan. John giggles 'shut up, Ife! How funny is it? We've got a regular.. we've got a regular thing going, me and Ife!' He glances in Josie's direction like a lost lamb because Caoimhe is now in bed with her having a natter, in his place. (SC) 

Ife and Mario are battling and Mars insults her for having fingers like Velociraptor claws! John calls over that when he and Ife wake up (as they always wake at the same time) for them to give it the cheeky wave. They find it weird that this happens simultaneously and Ife theorises that it has something to do with space in their minds.  

JOHN: Don't start talking about that stuff! The Monk's gonna wake up and put his two cents in!

Josie is whispering to Caoimhe about how frightening she finds the robot and how he'd spat out what she said about - feeling a bit low and the woman who had her face ripped off by the chimpanzee. So she realises that BB must be picking up on every conversation as she doesn't recall saying it. Corin and Ben are chinwagging and chuckling about Coronation Street - that's why he wanted to come in bed with her as they have a laugh! 

John hazards a guess that BB will try to have another 3 or 4 of them turned into robots tomorrow. Mario is super into creeping to distemper John and skulks towards John's bed (not in shot) but is stopped as John shouts out that he can see him! His pale skin almost glows in the dark as he lurks around. (Long SC) 

Back in bed with Ife, Mario laughs at her and her crazy, crazy ways. John ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha's in an infantile manner at Josie for something he eavesdrops her relaying to Caoimhe about a hospital appointment. 

JOHN: (needs to interject to let her know she deserved whatever it was) That serves you right, Jose! What goes around comes around. 

JOSIE: Did you just say something? 

JOHN: (this is his idea of funny) Was that a little bird over there? (SC and they are still not shown on my TV box) 

Josie didn't cry for a year and John didn't for about 2 years 'until I met you Jose! And then I started everyday!' She thanks him sarcastically 'make me feel bad, why don't you?' They are still trading repartees, slamming on each other in the back of the room but these are drowned out by Corin and Ben likening themselves to Ken Barlow and Blanche!! The next fragment I hear is Josie wondering why it is that she's been able to make John cry. 

JOHN: (hoodwinks) Cos you're a nasty piece of work!

Caoimhe springs to Josie's defence 'how f**king dare you?' she spoofily roasts him by delivering a word of warning if he carries on. It's frustrating that this all occurs out of view because I would have been interested in seeing their facial expressions in this debate.. the tone was mirthful and zippy but did the looks they were giving match this? 

Because John cried so early on in the show, over Josie I just jumped the gun that he was of a surprisingly delicate constitution.. as from what I watched I didn't consider it to be crying material. But maybe John had to be something of a silent sufferer when it came to mourning his father's death because he said he needed to be strong for his Mum. Furthermore, if he didn't permit himself the opportunity to grieve for his Dad that could account for his hyper-sensitivity towards certain situations, mostly revolving Josie. My heart would really pour out to him in those instances especially as Josie would act as though her own were made of stone. 

Ife asks Steve to order Mario to stop groping her and somebody (John?) pulls off their duvet, then lets go while Josie and Caoimhe describe how strong Steve is, even with one arm. 

JOHN: The glow stick (Mario) is going down!

Josie walks past to go in the toilet in just her vest top and pants and h'obvs John gobbles at her like she's a turkey.  

JOSIE: (He clucks) Don't John!

He's such a tinker as he keeps wolf-whistling and WOOOOO-ing! Potshots are taken at Ben as he hasn't shut up since he's been in that bed; John thought he needed 8 hours of sleep! (SC)

JOHN: What.. are you a bat? You can see in the dark?

STEVE: Good night, Benny boy! Enjoy yourself over there, sunshine. 

 They start to reminisce about Sunshine, Caoimhe now changes her tune that Sunshine was actually alright. Whenever Ife thinks of Lady Gaga she is now instantly reminded of Sunshine and knows that she'd have pimped up Corin's costume with silver lipstick. John asks if they reckon she did all that stuff before she knew who Lady Gaga was; Ife does. Mario comes on to Nathan then jeers that the bed is itchy because it's filled with Ife's scabies! 

Caoimhe hasn't got changed and John questions if she sleeps in her clothes; she'll live and die in those leggings of hers! Ife won't let Mario out of the bed as she wants them to sleep so they'll have enough energy to 'beat that monster! We'll be so annoyed if we don't. We want to win the premier shopping, don't we?'  Steve schemes to kick Titan in the electronic testicles but that is foiled straight away as they aren't allowed to touch it. 

JOHN: (groans as the camera zooms in, hovering over his bed) Oh why do you always come down here? There's nothing going on here, you D*CK head! (Steve titters) Every f**king night that camera is.. f**king hell! (sits up slightly to smile and wave) Hi, hello! 

STEVE: It loves ya, Johnny!

JOHN: (from his mouth to BB's ears) F**king d*ckhead. Can't pick my nose or nothin' when it's on me! Hey? 

Knowing this, is enough for Ife to never get back in John's single bed - so is the swap off? The prat prattles that she reeeeeally likes that John James calls her Keevs. Pass me a sick bucket! Most of her close friends will call her Guiller as a shortened form of her surname Guilfoyle. John mishears her 'from the Gilmore Girls?' (small squee if he's watched that as it's one of my fave shows)  (LOOOOOOOOOOONG SC's) 

Dave, John and Josie are finding his tumble into Steve's wheelchair too funny for words! John considers that the moment was right up there with Benny being taped to the board. Dave had been walking across the room, minding his own business when cyclone Josie blew into town. 

JOHN: She got up, swung him around like a hurricane, Dave went down, you were ready for more and Dave was.. 

Josie's sorry as she thought Dave was John James for a minute; John says that Dave had given her puppy dog eyes seeing if everything was alright with Jose beforehand. 

JOHN: (on a monumental scale) Cyclone Josie came out of the blue! 

The cameras are fixed on Mario and Ife annoyingly while Dave joshes with Josie for swinging an old man around the room! John comments that the look on Dave's face was the best as he seriously had no idea what was going on. In a bid to silence everyone, Ife announces to the guys that she doesn't normally speak out of turn but.. 'we want to beat this robot, don't we? Yes! So let's go to sleep and let's beat him!' John L.O.L's at her outburst. 

Dave ignores Ife's unsubtle hint and elaborates to Josie that he was totally not expecting it. 

DAVE: It's one of the weirdest things that's happened to me in this house. You don't even realise your own strength! You threw me around like a rag doll! I couldn't even stop myself going. 

It ended up with him knowing he was going down, unable to do anything about it and CRACK smacked his head straight on the chair! She's genuine when she says how sorry she is but what made Dave laugh was that Josie even did the sound effects. John pipes up 'that's what she does!' Dave stands up to deliver a humorous replay of Josie's WOOF and how the bedsheet had been choking him, as she swung him like a lasso, giving it large! 

DAVE: (again with the exaggerations) Did you see my glasses fly off? I was still on my feet, before my glasses fell to the floor. 

Josie hadn't seen and is so sorry, he tells her it is okay. John found the best part to be the sound effects; she says these are the noises she makes when she 'punches' John James - pow, pow, pow! Mario says something that we're not going to like - about thinking of it as a MAGICAL ADVENTURE! 

JOSIE: I think I've been in the robot suit, yeah.. and John James was in bed and he's been mashing me up, all day right? And proper giving me a good hiding in my robot suit, then you came along and cos he was in bed I thought 'righttt!' and I'd just taken it off and I was like 'yeahhh, have it!' .. but I'm really sorry. 

Dave dispenses his hunch that he must have gone about 10-12 feet across the floor. It was when Dave cracked his head against that the wheelchair that Josie thought 'OMG what have I done?' He gets her to imagine what if.. she'd knocked him out or he'd had to have stitches - she doesn't know what she'd have done. 

JOSIE: You probably think I'm f**king Satan in disguise or something. What a joke! I get too boisterous. 

JOHN: (his interest has been caught) It wasn't just an ordinary stock-standard swing! She full got a bit of momentum and did a bit of a jump, as she was swinging you around! (JJJ giggle, long SC) Hurricane Josie, just f**king comes out to play, lassoing you across the room. (Josie keeps apologising profusely) It got that much momentum that he had to actually do a little bit of an army roll, before he smacked his head into the wheelchair! 

Dude, he had so much momentum that he couldn't stop going - that was it! It was when she turned round to see Dave hit his forehead that she thought 'uh ohhh!! (she and Dave crack up) I'm so sorry, why did I do that?' Dave doesn't know. 

JOSIE: John James, don't beat me up in my robot suit tomorrow because otherwise.. 

JOHN: The Monk's gonna cop it!

Dave recognises that he's going to get the flipping retribution of it all  and will feel the rage against the machine.. as when Josie gets it off, she's gonna go mental. 

JOHN: (gives fair warning) So watch out, Monk!     

Monkface really finds it one of the weirder things Josie's done and that it takes toy fighting to another level. Josie thought she was a Gladiator and Dave compares it to Shadow from the film, who is really good at throwing the rope around 'the one who'd throw the net on you and bludgeon you death - it was a bit like that! If they had the camera on that, that would make some funny viewing, that would!' 

JOSIE: But I'm really sorry, Dave. 

DAVE: That's alright, I liked it - it was fun!

Caoimhe instigates a chorus of procreative 'OH YEAH'S' like she's a high class prostitute! If that thing is at the end of Josie's bed in the morning, she is going to fly kick it in the face!! Dave says it was funny when Josie was doing the dustpan and brush task versus the robot and it was obvious she was on a loser, she looked up every now and again where she was getting whupped and shouted obscenities. Steve laughs that Jose should have run over and unplugged Titan's hoover! 

Josie asks aloud if there's any way someone could have won that; John answers in the affirmative but Dave reckons it would have been tough. She unfolds to him that it was sawdust and maggots so John canvasses if it was easy to sweep up - it wasn't. He adds that it was definitely the hardest one, no doubt about that; Dave thought they were all going to be impossible after seeing Josie's but then theirs (his with Ben) and Caoimhe's were easier. 'I haven't got any hair left now, but it was an easy task!' (picks his nose)  

What Caoimhe wants to know is how someone can fall asleep that quickly.. only moments before Steve had been speaking with them but suddenly the Wilderbeest snores have started up! Josie fears she's going to be up all night without her thumbs, the stuff has worked as she hasn't sucked them since applying it. Dave doesn't know where the ball is to throw at Steve, Steve awakens and isn't mean about it but tells Dave to f**k off as he'd heard that! 

Dave lays there and tries to bond with Josie about this - that it must look so bad on TV for people to throw stuff at an old, disabled war Veteran while he's asleep! 'War hero gets smacked in the head with a shoe!'  

CAOIMHE: (giggling) Dave, shut the f**k up will ya? Seriously. (SC) 

Josie stipulates to Dave that they'll talk in the morning but they are soon back to har-de-har-ing about earlier; Caoimhe wants Dave to ask the glory there to let him to go to sleep. He blames this bout of babbles on Josie, who started it; Caoimhe replies that he's actually very funny (he dittos this of Josie) 'thanks Dave, I hope we're friends.'  

STEVE: Anyone got a spare Tampax, to shove in Dave's mouth? 

Dave's assurance that he and Caoimhe are friends is not convincing enough for her so she enquires again; his answer hasn't changed 'yeah, we're friends, just leave me alone. Stop starting arguments with me and we'll be friends.' She demurs that she starts arguments but that they are debates; Dave rails that they get very heated but no, no, no she disagrees. Josie is so comfortable and a little after checks Caoimhe is alright, thinking that she was crying but she wasn't. Live feed finishes shortly after.